MELTDOWN
by Donna McIntosh
Summary: Skinner retires, Krycek retires, Mulder gets kidnapped, Krycek gets kidnapped. It's one hell of a mess!


Title: MELTDOWN

Author: X-Files

Paring: Skinner/Krycek & Mulder/Krycek

Rating: NC-17 FRAO

Warning: M/M sex scenes

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Chris Carter. I just let them have a lot more fun than he did.

Summary: Walter retires; Alex retires; Mulder gets kidnapped; Alex gets kidnapped; it's one hell of a mess! Scully loves Mulder, Mulder loves Alex, Alex loves Skinner – just like Days of Our Lives! It all works out in the end and the right couple end up together.

Special thanks: To Ursula for her fine Beta work!

MELTDOWN

Walter walked into his hotel room, dumped his wallet, keys, phone etc on the dresser; pulled his tie off and loosened the top button on his shirt. He wadded his tie in a ball and tossed it towards the dresser; it missed and landed on the floor. He stared at it for a minute then shoved everything off the dresser onto the floor including the paper covered glasses, ash tray, TV schedule, hotel paperwork. A foot against the desk chair sent it flying across the room. That felt so good he turned over the table and kicked it up against the wall. His shoe came half-way off so he pulled it the rest of the way off and threw it bouncing it off the window; the second shoe followed with a bang.

He pulled his shirt open and off, popping all the buttons and sending them skittering across the carpet. He tossed it in the vicinity of the up-turned table. He stopped and stared when he saw the wild man he'd become glaring back at him from the mirror; tears streaming down his cheeks and spittle on his chin; his mouth open and twisted in a snarl.

Someone knocked on the door.

"GO AWAY!" He screamed and sat on the side of the bed, his head in his hands, elbows on his knees.

A slight noise at the door knob and it opened. Alex Krycek walked in.

"Oh God! Go away! PLEASE!" He pleaded looking up and seeing who it was.

"I brought you something." Krycek said and held up two bottles of Jack Daniels. He retrieved the two glasses from the floor, pulled the paper off them and opened one of the bottles. He poured some into each glass and handed one to Skinner.

Skinner gulped it down with a gasp and reached for more.

"One more then you need to eat something." He opened the brown paper bag he brought in and took out two sandwiches. He poured another short drink for Skinner while he sipped at his own.

"I don't want anything to eat, just keep pouring or get the hell out of the way and give me that bottle." Skinner raised the glass and downed it in four great gulps.

"Here," Krycek tossed a sandwich in Skinner's lap.

"I said I don't want your fucking sandwich," Skinner tossed it back.

"No sandwich, no booze. Eat it." Krycek righted the table and chair and sat down. "Jack Daniels on an empty stomach is not a good thing."

"I don't give a fuck. Give me the bottle and get the hell out of my room."

"Nope. I go, the bottles go with me. Eat."

The phone rang and Skinner looked at it with pain. Krycek picked it up and answered it.

"Yes?"

"He's un-available right now."

"I'll tell him you called."

He hung up the phone.

"So you're my God-damned secretary now? What are you doing here, Krycek? I'm not in the mood for your games." He scrubbed a hand over his bald head and down over his face.

"I know. I tried, Skinner. I really did try to find him too. There was just no way we could have known that he had that farm up here in his mother's maiden name. Who could have known that?"

"We were so close…we almost made it!" Skinner's face twisted in pain.

"I know. You did everything you could. Everyone did. There is just no way to out-smart a mad man." He sat down on the bed beside Skinner and handed him his sandwich again. "Please, eat this and we'll empty both those bottles."

Skinner picked up the sandwich and took a bite. "I'm not hungry."

"I know. Neither am I. But we can't get drunk on an empty stomach. C'mon." He unwrapped another sandwich and started in on it himself.

Skinner took another bite and Krycek poured him a short drink; just a few swallows. He sipped at his own drink.

Skinner finished his sandwich in silence and Krycek poured him a full glass of whiskey.

"I should have done something…some how I should have figured it out…should have tried harder, gotten there on time."

Skinner's cell phone started ringing from the corner of the room where it had been thrown. Krycek found it and turned it off and placed it back on the dresser.

Skinner stood up and began pacing the floor, kicking stuff out of his path. He sipped his drink as he went. Krycek was glad that he had calmed down enough to sip instead of gulp the whiskey down.

"Skinner, the man was a maniac. You did everything you could to find Anderson; no one could have done more."

"Yeah, I did! But what good did it do? He's still dead, Krycek! Dead!" His face crumpled and the tears began to stream down his cheeks again. He turned away and gulped a few more swallows; and let the whiskey burn a path down his insides.

"It sucks, Skinner. I know that. I just wish we could have gotten to him before he ate his gun. That bastard went out way too easy."

"Fucking bastard!" Skinner kicked the side of the bed knocking the mattress askew.

Krycek came over to him and re-filled his glass. "Drink," he said sympathetically.

"Why, Krycek? WHY? He had just made agent. I met his parents; they were so proud and now he's dead just two, three months later? It doesn't make any sense. There was no connection between Anderson and the killer at all that we could find."

"Who knows? He might have cut him off in traffic or bumped into him in an elevator. There's just no way of knowing why or how someone could do that to another human being. Something was twisted inside of him."

Walter began his pacing again. "Did you see him? The body?"

"Yeah, I did. Try not to think about it." Alex said; tears stinging his eyes as he emptied his glass and poured another.

Walter leaned his forehead against the cool glass of the window. Alex came up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. No words were exchanged between them for a while; they simply stood there staring out into the night as they shared their pain.

"Why would he go off like that; follow a lead alone in the middle of the night without backup?" Walter said; his words filled with agony.

"I don't know. I think that's something we've all done at one time or another in this business."

"It's so unfair. I don't understand how things like this can happen." Walter barely whispered.

"I know. And there's nothing anyone can say that makes any sense of this kind of thing."

"I wanted to kill him. I would have killed him with my bare hands if he had still been alive when I got there." Skinner hissed out through gritted teeth.

"I was thinking along those same lines myself." Krycek agreed; his hand resting on Skinner's shoulder.

"Where's that bottle? I need another drink!" Skinner reeled from the window and headed for the bottle. He slopped whiskey into his glass and gulped it down. Krycek joined him and held out his glass; Skinner poured it half full and the first bottle was empty.

"I should have done more! Someone should have done more. He never had a chance." His head hung down and his shoulders shook. "Christ, don't they warn against this very thing at Quantico? Isn't that one of the first things you're taught?"

"I'm sure it is, Walter. Just as I'm sure that every one of us has ignored that lesson at one time or another. Each of us sure we can take care of ourselves. I guess we were just lucky."

Krycek sat down beside him, opened the new bottle and refilled each of their drinks.

"It's a hell of a fucked up world."

Skinner lay back on the bed, one arm raised up and over his face, the other balancing his drink on his abdomen. The hotel phone rang and Krycek reached over and unplugged it.

"You didn't want to talk to anyone, did you?" Krycek asked.

"Hell no! Where's that bottle?" Skinner lifted his head up enough to drain his glass and hold it out for a refill. Krycek obliged; filling both their glasses.

"You know what I think should have been done to him if we'd gotten to him before he ate his gun? They should have turned him over to Anderson's buddies or his fellow agents at the Hoover. Let them take care of him, nice and slow.

"Yeah, but that never would have happened. Some public defender would get his case and he'd end up in some mental institution for the rest of his life; being fed, sheltered, and taken care of by US tax payers." Skinner said then added, "If I'd had any access to him, he'd never have made it to trial." He drained half his glass and lay back down.

"I guess it's best then for all of us, that he took the coward's way out." Krycek lay back on the bed beside Skinner. "Oh shit! I'm dizzy."

"You need another drink; pour me one too." Skinner slurred his words.

Krycek sloshed whiskey into Skinner's glass and ran it over onto his chest. He poured himself another glassful.

Skinner sat up and pulled his undershirt off over his head and wiped the mess and tossed the shirt into a corner, then lay back down. They drank in silence for a while. After one last refill of a half glass each Krycek announced that the bottle was empty. He tossed it across the room and sipped his drink. Skinner finished his and tossed the glass in the direction of the bottle. Krycek did the same.

Skinner scooted up on the bed and found a pillow and balled it up under his head. Krycek grabbed the other pillow and stretched out beside him.

"You know," Skinner whispered, "I keep seeing his face the first day I met him. He looked so young, like he was barely old enough to shave."

"I know."

Skinner pounded his fist into the pillow and the tears came again; his sobbing shaking the bed.

Krycek rolled over and put his arm around Skinner's shoulders; their heads touching, he whispered, "He's in a better place now, Walter, no one can hurt him ever again."

"Do you believe that? You really believe in that kind of stuff?"

"I do. If I didn't, I couldn't go on. Life is just too painful. There has to be something at the end of it; something that makes it all worth while."

"I don't know. I just don't know any more." He lay his head back down and drifted off to sleep.

A few hours later they awoke in a spooned position. Walter in back with Alex wrapped tightly in his arms; his cheek resting on a soft bed of hair. His hips pressed forward against the warm body and hips pressed back against him. There was no thought process going on, only the ache of raw need. Hands fumbled with snaps and zippers and slacks and jeans slid to the floor. Saliva in the palm of the hand and they were grunting together; taking and giving the only comfort they had in them. It was over in a few short minutes and Walter passed out, rolling over on his back while Alex collapsed face down.

The next either of them knew, sun was shining in their eyes and they were groaning awake. Walter staggered to the bathroom and the shower came on. Alex sat up rubbing his temples and wondering where his clothes went. His body knew what happened but all his head could think about was where he had left the brown paper bag with the package of Tylenol in it. He made a tentative swipe at his stickiness with the corner of the sheet but gave up and went on his search for the pills.

He found the two glasses and sat the table up-right. He stepped on something – Walter's wallet, and tossed it on the dresser. He finally found the bag and opened the package with his teeth. He had just gotten the cap off when Walter emerged from the bathroom; towel wrapped around his waist as he started hunting through his bag for some clean clothing.

Alex took the glasses into the bathroom and filled them with water. He came out and handed Walter one; along with three extra strength Tylenol. He downed three as well and headed for the shower. When he came out, Walter was dressed and stuffing his dirty clothes into his bag.

Alex dressed quickly and was putting his jacket on as Walter headed for the door. He paused for a minute, looked back at Alex and mumbled "Thanks" and left.

Six weeks later…

Walter pulled his car into the underground parking garage at Viva Towers; parked his car and got out. He heaved a great sigh as he pressed the 'lock' button on his key chain and headed for the elevator.

"Psssssst, Skinner. Over here." A voice called out to him from the shadows.

He recognized the voice immediately; glanced around the parking area; no one was around.

"Why are you hiding? There's no one around." He called back.

"Cameras." Alex Krycek answered as he stepped out of the darkness. "Come over here. I have something to tell you."

Skinner looked up at the security camera and realized that the angle of the camera could not reach the spot where Krycek was standing; back against the wall of the equipment shed. He stepped over into the shadows.

"What's this all about? What do you have to tell me? You're pregnant?" He said it all with a straight face.

Krycek laughed out loud. It was a strange little laugh; from someone who didn't do it very often.

"I wanted to tell you that your apartment phone is bugged." Alex answered with a trace of the grin still on his lips.

"And how would you know that?" Walter asked in all seriousness.

"Because I just bugged it."

They stared at each other for a few moments. A car entered their level and they stepped further back into the shadows. The couple parked their car, got out and walked to the elevator. The doors opened and they were gone.

"So this is what you do for fun on a Friday night?" Walter asked.

"In my line of work, you don't get all that many opportunities for fun." Alex answered.

"So you bug peoples phones then tell them about it? Sounds pretty boring to me. Is this about the Bristol case?"

"Yeah, the Bristol case. The old man's frustrated as hell."

"Good! He could use a little frustration."

"So what have you got planned for this fine Friday evening?" Krycek asked.

"Oh, I have all kinds of plans," Walter answered, "I've got a party going on upstairs. The rest of the crowd should be here any minute."

"Same crowd you had here last week and the week before?" Alex asked knowing no one had been to Walter's apartment in months.

"Yeah, that's them." Walter looked around the empty garage area and thought it pretty well mirrored his life – cold and empty.

"I know that crowd. They're nice and quiet." Alex agreed.

"Well there's fun and then again there's fun."

"Uh huh. You getting any of this kind of fun?" Alex said and reached forward and pressed the palm of his hand against Walter's crotch; not the least surprised to find him half way hard.

"Probably a lot more than you are," Walter answered and pressed his hips forward into the warm hand while his hand reached out and squeezed the bulge in the black denim.

"Oh I don't know about that," Alex said as he unzipped Walter's slacks and worked his hand inside and underneath the cotton briefs.

Walter suppressed a groan as his hips moved in rhythm with the hand. He pulled Alex's zipper down and made an entrance of his own; caressing balls and giving as good as he was getting.

Another car pulled into the area and parked quite near them. Four people got out, talking and laughing and walked right by them, headed for the elevator. Alex took that moment to run his thumb back and forth across Walter's moist tip, eliciting a gasp. Alex used his plastic arm around Walter's neck pulled him into a kiss as his real hand pulled on Walter's swollen flesh.

The whoosh of the elevator door closed and the voices were silent. Walter pressed forward pinning Alex against the cement wall. His mouth devoured Alex's as his hand worked furiously in his jeans. They had to break the kiss to breathe but in seconds they each uttered a strangled groan and finished. Another car entered and they pulled apart, each trying to secure their clothes. By the time that person parked, got out and disappeared into the elevator, Alex was gone. Walter wiped his hands on his handkerchief and headed for the elevator with just the slightest trace of a grin at the corners of his mouth.

Skinner's speech ran thirty minutes over his allotted time but still he droned on. His was the last speech of the evening and there wasn't a son-of-a-bitch in the room who was even listening. People were squirming in their seats, looking at their watches and thinking about what they were going to do for dinner. He went on and on dragging it out as long as possible; then in the middle of a sentence, he stopped, picked up his notes and left the podium; walked out of the room and out of the building.

He caught a quick bite to eat at a small café he had found near his hotel. He chastised himself for thinking that this group would be any different. No one was interested in security; that was always someone else's job; someone else's department.

The fact that he was sitting down to dinner before any of the others, pleased him. The little cafe was quiet and the food was good. He stopped at a liquor store and picked up a bottle of Jack Daniels and headed for his hotel. The evening was beginning to look up. He could have taken an evening flight home from Chicago but decided to stay over and leave first thing in the morning.

He was in no hurry to go home to an empty apartment and as he got out of the elevator on his floor, realized that an empty hotel room wasn't much better. He had a phone number he could call for some company and thought about doing that for a while but he had come to feel that hiring someone wasn't all that much better than his good right hand. He was on his second drink when someone knocked at his door.

He waited for the second knock then went to the door, determined to get rid of whoever it was. He looked through the peephole, yanked the door open, grabbed a fistful of black leather jacket and dragged Krycek into the room. In one swift movement, the door was closed, the lock turned and Krycek was up against the wall with Skinner's tongue in his mouth.

A heartbeat later, Alex's zipper was down and Skinner was on his knees in front of him showing him just how happy he was to see him. Alex's head thumped back against the wall as his hips pressed forward and gave Skinner what he so desperately wanted; then sank down beside him afterwards.

"Hi," he whispered in a throaty breath.

"Hi, yourself," Walter answered wiping the corner of his mouth on the back of his hand.

"I suppose it's pointless to ask why you're here and how you knew where to find me."

"I can usually find what's important to me." Alex answered as they stood.

"I need to fuck you," Skinner said matter-of-factly.

Alex grinned and peeled off his leather jacket. "I thought you might," He said as he reached into his pocket, pulled out his wallet, removed a condom and packet of lube and handed it to Walter. He then slipped his sweat shirt up over his head and tossed it on a chair, conscious of Walter watching his every movement. He reached down and pulled off one boot; then the other; his eyes never leaving Walter's.

He slid his jeans and underwear down slowly bringing an audible gasp from Walter. He slowly walked over to the bed and pulled the spread off tossing it in a corner. He looked back over his shoulder at Walter, "Up or down?" he asked.

"Up," Walter answered loosening his tie and unbuttoning his white shirt. He toed off his shoes. He laid his slacks and shirt neatly on the same chair with Alex's tossed clothes; slipped off his socks and dampened whities and strode over to the bed.

He stood a few minutes staring at the naked body before him. Never in a million years did he expect that the sight of Alex Krycek naked could excite him to such an extent. This was not the same Krycek he had known for so many years. That Krycek was evil and dangerous. He had a fleeting thought that this might be a replicant, a clone, or maybe even an alien but none of that mattered right now.

He reached out and caressed the cheek and gazed into the smoky emerald green eyes. The sensuous lips parted to show even white teeth; the up-turned nose just made for nuzzling.

He brought their lips together—instant spontaneous combustion. He dove head first into blissful passion. Passion the likes of which he had never known. He ground their bodies together; hands grasping holding them together tighter and tighter; legs entangling, feet running up and down each others legs rubbing and caressing as much skin as possible while their mouths refused to part. They rolled over and over; first Walter on top then Alex each savoring both positions; having the weight on top of them and being the weight pressing down on the other.

The room was filled with gasps and sighs and the soft sounds of the bed giving under their combined weight.. Sighs turned into moans and gasps into grunts as their bodies became one. The tussles, the grasping and the desperation of their coupling, all too soon over with as they collapsed onto the sweaty sheets and sank into oblivion.

A short snooze that was followed by a shower with Alex on his knees this time long enough to get Walter ready, then turning his back to him and getting it again, hands braced against the tile wall, legs as far apart as the tub would allow and Walter bucking against him fast and furious while the water rained over them and filled the room with steam.

Breathless and exhausted they fell into bed and a deep sound sleep.

The morning brought the awkward searching for the right clothes, quick dressing and mumbled "See ya around," as they each went their separate ways.

Walter cursed underneath his breath as he made his way back to his office. "Just who the hell does he think he is? Mr. Deputy Director Shit Ass Kirsch!" He couldn't stand the man and to have to stand there and be talked to like he was a shave-tail rookie made the bile rise to the point where he couldn't decide if he should deck the guy or throw up on his shiny shoes. He chose instead to turn and walk from the man's office while he was in mid sentence. He grinned with satisfaction through gritted teeth as the man followed him out into the hall shouting at him, "You can't just walk out; I haven't finished with you!"

He walked into his office and slammed the door behind him; his secretary cringing at her desk. He started piling files into his briefcase to take home to work on and changed his mind. He stood up and emptied the briefcase into the wastebasket.

He tossed his glasses on his desk and began to pace. He HATED this job; he HATED his life; he HATED what he'd let himself become. In allowing himself to become Spender's puppet, he had given up any chance of career advancement. That meant spending the rest of his working life bowing to the likes of Kirsch and his ilk. He couldn't stand it! He had to get out, find something else to do; but what? Where should he go? What should he do?

Decision made; first thing to do was to get drunk! He shouldered into his coat and walked out his door into the outer office. As he strode past his secretary's desk he said, "I'm out for the rest of the day."

"But, Sir…"

"I'M OUT! I'll be back in the morning; maybe." He was out the door and gone.

"What do you want, Krycek. I'm in no mood for any of your crap." Mulder asked as he leaned against the doorway.

"I thought maybe we could talk a little. I brought a pizza." Krycek smiled at him knowing full well Mulder never turned down a pizza in his life.

"I don't know anything about anything so if this visit is to gain information, you're shit out of luck." Mulder inhaled the aroma of spices and melted cheese as he eyed the box.

"I was just in the neighborhood, I was hungry for pizza and a little dessert and I thought you might be interested. It's been a couple of months." Krycek persisted with a small come-hither grin.

"No questions?" Mulder asked, weakening.

"No questions," Krycek assured. He always enjoyed it when he got the orders to keep Mulder busy for an evening. It used to be difficult but in the last year he had managed to not only bed him but get information as well as plant some misleading information. This was one of the few times when his job didn't really suck.

"OK; just pizza and no nonsense!" Mulder opened the door and let him in. He walked to the kitchen for some beer.

Krycek followed him in. "Now that depends on what you call nonsense, doesn't it." Krycek sat down on the couch and opened the pizza box. Mulder joined him with two bottles of beer.

They ate in silence watching the remainder of a Star Trek episode fade from the screen.

Krycek let out a loud belch.

"Do you have to do that?" Mulder asked with disgust.

"What's the matter; you in a bad mood?" Krycek asked and reached to massage the taut shoulders. "Turn around so I can do this right." He kneaded the tight muscles.

"Pizza's gone. You'd better leave." Mulder said rolling his head so that Krycek could get better access to the tight muscles.

"You really want me to leave?" Krycek whispered against the side of Mulder's neck where he was placing little damp kisses.

"You think you can just come in here and buy me with a pizza?" Mulder was leaning back into the caresses.

"Uh huh," Krycek answered slipping a hand under Mulder's shirt and pinching a nipple.

"You bastard," Mulder whispered as he allowed his shirt and jeans to be removed and he lay face down on the old leather couch.

"Um hmm, that's me; Rat bastard Krycek. Isn't that what you call me?" Krycek pulled his boots off and slid out of his jeans. A condom and some lube and he was in.

Mulder groaned his appreciation pushing back with every thrust. "I hate you!" he whispered.

"Yeah, I know; but the Rat Bastard scores again!" Krycek gave him a good pounding until they were both limp and exhausted. A quick trip to the bathroom and he was pulling his jeans back on.

"Get the hell out!" Mulder groused at him still naked and face down on the couch.

"See ya around," Krycek said as he closed the door behind him.

He drove home feeling just a little disgusted with himself. "What the fuck! He wanted it or he never would have let me in," he rationalized. It didn't make him feel any better.

He was now bedding both Skinner and Mulder. Part of him gloated over the idea; the other part felt a little sick to his stomach. There couldn't be too more opposites on the planet than Skinner and Mulder, he couldn't figure out how or why they both just did it for him.

Mulder with all his diplomas and credentials and still wide-eyed and innocent in so many ways and that runner's ass that just seemed to suck him in and wring him out. Mulder was built to be fucked and fucked often. He just wished sometimes that he could get to it more often.

And Skinner? Skinner was a powerhouse. The guy was built and had the sexual energies of a nineteen year old and the body to go along with it. Whenever he wanted an all-nighter he sought Skinner out. For a man of his age; a good 15 years older than Krycek, he was a regular Energizer Bunny.

Krycek made it to his apartment and into bed and continued his thoughts on the subject until sleep overtook him and he drifted off thinking about sleeping against the softly furred chest of Walter Skinner.

Mulder lay on his couch and wept. He hated his life; he hated not knowing all the things that he so desperately needed to know; he hated being at loose ends, working at the Bureau but not in the X-Files where he belonged; and most of all, most of all he hated, HATED Alex Krycek!

He hated the way Krycek made him feel; all needy and desperate. Needy and desperate though he was, he didn't want people to see him that way; especially not Krycek. He hated the way his breath caught in his throat the minute he heard Krycek's voice. He hated the way his whole body quivered at his touch. He hated those nights after Krycek came to visit him. The only thing worse was the nights when Krycek didn't come and he was alone to spend the long night pacing the floor.

Most of all, above all else, he hated Krycek for making him want the dirty scum sucking rat bastard!

Mulder paced the floor and cursed!

Skinner paced the floor and cursed. "Where the hell is he? It's been weeks!" He poured himself another drink and stared out his balcony window. "Where is he? What's he doing? Who's he doing?"

He cursed some more, first at Krycek for making him wait like this, then at himself for allowing his need for this man to over power everything else in his life. He kicked the couch and went upstairs to bed.

Krycek zipped his jeans and slipped into his leather jacket. He went back into the living room, picked up the telephone receiver, unscrewed the cap, inserted the bug, replaced the cap and exited Marita Corvarubias's apartment; all in a night's work for Alex Krycek.

He drove along the deserted night's streets, only a few other lost souls with screwed up lives driving around at 3am. He sighed as he passed the darkened apartment buildings and wondered what it would be like to be able to go to bed every night in the same bed and to be able to sleep through the night; maybe even to wake up with the same person each morning. That was not his life though; it never had been and never would be.

Part of it might be though, if his plans worked out. His goal was ten million. Once he had that much stashed, he'd be gone and the old man could shit and eat dirt for all he cared! His goal was coming closer every year.

When he first formulated his plan, he never thought he'd live long enough to put it into action but here he was, eight years later, still alive and the cash, stocks, and bonds were piling up. Four years ago, he had found the perfect place; an old farm house way out in the country, thirty miles from the nearest town and a hundred miles from any large city.

The next few years he had the major work done on the property, new plumbing and electrics, new septic system and central heat and air conditioning installed. The place still needed a lot of TLC but he figured that would give him something to do and he enjoyed all that painting and papering and landscaping. He had worked for a contractor during his college years and they specialized in restoring older homes so he had a pretty good idea of what needed to be done and how to do it. He had also done some landscape work a couple of summers during high school so he was very familiar with the concept.

He was looking forward to having a place of his own; somewhere where no one could find him. He had worked hard at covering his tracks. He only went up there in the most round about way to make sure that he wasn't followed.

He had the property and all the upgrades paid for in full and was slowly beginning to believe that he might actually get a chance to live there. His net worth was almost at the goal he had set for himself and if he could just make it about another year; he'd have enough; enough to start a new life in comfort and relative obscurity. If he got good news back from the guy selling his diamonds, he might not have to wait that long. He had to concentrate on one thing right now and that was to survive; keep the old man off guard, not draw any suspicion on himself and just survive!

He went into his apartment, tossed his keys and wallet on the dresser and turned on the shower; nothing like a good hot shower after sex to put him to sleep. Afterwards he snuggled down into the covers; a vision of horn-rimmed glasses and the smell of starched white shirts and broad shoulders floated behind his eyes as he drifted off to blissful sleep.

In Alexandria, Fox Mulder paced the floor and cursed.

In Crystal City, Walter Skinner paced the floor and cursed.

Krycek unloaded six cases of soup onto the dolly and headed into his house. It was time to stock up and his rental truck was loaded. This was the first time he'd brought food up and he was trying to prepare so that he wouldn't have to leave the premises for a year if he could hold out that long. He figured that if he could stay hidden for a year the old man would quit looking for him. He bought all kinds of canned food, soups, stews, meats and bottled water just in case something went wrong with the well water, though he didn't expect that to happen as he had it checked thoroughly and had a new well head and pump installed.

Load after load he wheeled up the makeshift ramp into the kitchen and stashed his supplies. He had long since brought up a loads of paper goods; napkins, toilet paper, Kleenex, paper towels; cleaning supplies, detergents, bath soap, cleansers, and personal products; toothpaste, deodorant, shampoo, etc. He worked diligently trying to figure how much he used in one month then multiplied that by 12.

The last of the supplies had been brought in and he made a fire in the fireplace and settled in for the night. His cell phone rang and he cursed, hoping it wasn't the old man. He was supposed to be in Mexico City for the next week. He hoped he didn't have to fly down there.

It was his contact who was selling the diamonds he had been collecting over the years. The first batch he had received several years ago as a reward in Hong Kong for finding a little lost girl he had stumbled on in an empty warehouse and returning her to her parents; her VERY rich parents. This contact had sold them for him and he banked a little over two million for them. That gave him the idea and the start. Every chance he got, he asked for payment in diamonds instead of cash. These diamonds all had papers and through the proper agent could bring in top dollar though they couldn't all be dumped on the market at once. His agent had been working for nearly a year, unloading his stash bit by bit and he had saved the best of the lot for last. These had come from an Arabian dignitary he had done some favors for.

The agent informed him that the deal was complete and the money had been transferred into Krycek's private Swiss account. The figure half again more than they had hoped for. That was it! He now had his ten million, plus.

He was giddy with excitement. He had his safe house, in some obscure corporate name, he had his money and now all he had to do was move in. He started listing in his head all the things he wanted to do before 'disappearing'.

He had some more shopping he wanted to do; more food to bring up. Last trip up he had two huge freezers delivered and set up. He wanted to get them both filled. He also wanted to stock up on some medicines in case he got sick. He wanted to get a new computer as he planned on wiping clean his old one and leaving it. He would need new clothes too as he was leaving everything in his apartment so it would like he just disappeared and not like he left on his own.

He had plans for the apartment too. He wanted to trash it, maybe leave a little of his blood around and make it look like he had been taken forcibly. Maybe the old man wouldn't look for him too diligently. That's what he was hoping for anyway.

He didn't sleep much that night; so much on his mind! He got an early start the next morning and headed out for Syracuse, approximately 100 miles drive. He was glad he still had the rental truck and drove directly to the mall.

He loaded up on clothes first; the most clothes he had ever had at one time and especially enjoyed picking out a pile lined Levi jacket to replace his signature leather jacket. He found a Sears and went in and bought bedding for his new king-sized bed, towels and bath mat set.

Next he found an electronic store and loaded up on computer equipment.

After the mall he hit a WalMart and stocked up on the rest of the food items that he wanted and then headed out to find the Butcher Shop where he had called and ordered enough meat to fill his freezers.

He returned home, unloaded all and headed back to DC taking an indirect route and turning the truck back in along the way.

Back in his apartment he busied himself setting the place to ruin. A small cut on his arm and he managed to drip some blood around starting with on the bed so it looked like he was set upon while he slept. Blood on the sheets and pillow case and some on the floor; a few more drips near the door and he was finished. He bandaged the cut, stashed the bandage wrapper in his pocket and stood and looked around.

He had cleared anything off his computer that he didn't want anyone to see and left it all there; left his clothes in the closet and dresser drawers; left food in the refrigerator and dishes in the sink, his leather jacket hanging on the back of a kitchen chair; a paperback he was reading was on the nightstand beside his gun and knife. He left a rag that had been soaked in chloroform on the floor by the bed.

It was all set. All he had to do now was leave with no one seeing him. That was not a problem. No one paid much attention to anyone else in this neighborhood and there were plenty of times he had come in and gone out through the fire escape. He left the front door unlocked and slightly ajar and went out the window, down the fire escape and into the alley.

He walked the four blocks to the bus stop in minutes he was on his way downtown and transferred to another bus that would take him to the outskirts of town. He got off and walked the rest of the way to where he had his new truck parked in a storage facility.

He sat in his truck gripping the steering wheel and his mind was wild with excitement. He was free! After all those years, he was finally free of it all! Free to go where he wanted when he wanted and do as he pleased.

His phone rang. He looked at the caller ID and saw it was the old man. A grin spread across his face as he slowly dismantled the phone and piled the little pieces on the dashboard making a mental note to toss them in the river as soon as he came to a bridge.

The sense of freedom was exhilarating. He drove with the window down and turned the radio on; loud. He ran his fingers through his hair and headed out. He made it to the highway and before he realized what he was doing, he took the Crystal City turn off.

Walter Skinner stood on his balcony and let the crisp autumn air chill him to the bone as he sipped his drink. He cursed himself for the fool he was and swore for the hundredth time that he was going to do something to change his life; but what?

Nothing occurred to him, nothing inspired him and so he stayed at the bureau, day after day, doing a job he had come to hate; working with people he despised and drank way too much every night. He was well on his way to becoming a serious alcoholic.

There was only one subject that he spent much time thinking about and that was Alex Krycek. He couldn't make sense of his feelings for the man. He knew what he was, knew what he did for a living and knew who he worked for; yet there was something about him; something almost childlike at times. The way he smiled with that turned up nose and those glittering emerald eyes and the way his voice got all smoky sounding when they were intimate.

This was not the kind of man he would want for a friend, or a neighbor. Not the kind he could trust or rely on. Not the kind to earn his respect and admiration. And certainly not the kind you take to meet your family and friends. Yet this was the man he yearned for; the one who visited him in his dreams that left the sheets stained.

He came back inside to refill his drink as someone knocked at his door. A quick check of his watch showed it was shortly after 11 pm. He checked the peep hole and felt his insides flip flop and the sudden swelling in his jeans.

He pulled the door opened and was shoved up against the wall, the door kicked shut and Alex's tongue half way down his throat. He gave way to the instant lust as Alex undid his jeans, sank to his knees and "said hello" the way he often did on visits.

Some time later Walter got up off the bed and gathered Alex's clothes and headed for the bathroom.

"Hey, where you going with my clothes?" Alex asked languishing naked on the sweaty sheets.

"I want to make sure you don't slip out on me while I'm cleaning up. We've got to talk."

"Oh shit, Walter. Are you going to ask me my intentions?" Alex laughed as he stretched out enjoying these last moments in Walter's bed.

"Your intentions? Hell I've always known your intentions. I want to talk about something more serious," he called from the bathroom. He turned the water off and dried himself. He brought a wet wash rag and a towel and tossed them to Alex.

"We don't talk about business; you know that." Alex sat up and cleaned himself.

"This is not about business. It's about us." Walter pulled his jeans and shirt on.

"Us?" Alex asked, astonished that Walter had even considered them an 'us'.

"Yeah; let's go downstairs. I can't think about anything but fucking you in this room."

"Not a thing wrong with that," Alex grinned pulling on his jeans and shirt and carrying his boots and socks as they headed down the stairs.

"You want a drink?" Walter offered as Alex sat on the white leather couch and finished dressing.

"No thanks. I got a long drive ahead of me." Alex answered.

"Where you headed?" Walter asked innocently enough.

Alex gave him a look that said that question wasn't going to be answered.

"Sorry," Walter apologized and sat down beside him on the couch. He leaned back and ran a hand over his face. He had thought about this conversation for weeks but the reality of getting it started was another thing.

"We've been seeing each other for about a year now. Shit!" He stood up and paced the floor. "I didn't think this would be so hard." The latter he said mostly to himself but Alex answered anyway.

"What's on your mind, Walter; you want me to stop coming here?" The thought suddenly occurred to him that he wouldn't be seeing Walter any more and it saddened him deeply. He cared about this man. He'd, for sure, miss the great sex they had but there was something more he couldn't quite put a finger on. A slow ache began inside him and he wanted to run from the apartment but the thought of this being the last time he ever saw Walter loomed over him. Was this what he wanted; never to see this man again? He had come here for one last session with the man and to tell him he was leaving but the thought of Walter telling HIM it was over; was something else again.

"No, that's not it at all. Alex, I care about you; a hell of a lot more than I should." Walter fumbled for the words. "I think you care about me too. Am I totally out of the ball park here?"

Alex stared at him, mouth opened, no words came out.

"Do you?" Walter asked, "I mean I know things are kind of awkward…"

"Awkward?" Alex asked, stunned by Walter's admission of feelings for him.

"You know what I mean. The way things are. Would it be different if I wasn't with the bureau? Could things be different? Would you want them to be?" None of this was what he had planned on saying but those were the words that came out.

Alex leaned forward, elbows on knees and plastic hand held by flesh hand. "Walter, what are you talking about here? How would you want things to be different?"

"What if I said I was ready to retire; move out of the city? Could we…I mean would you want to…Crap! I'm fucking this all up." Walter strode over to his liquor cabinet and poured himself a drink. He took two gulps and set the glass back down.

Alex stood up and came over to him. "You're seriously thinking about retiring?"

"Yes! I hate my job; I hate this stone mausoleum that I live in; I hate my life, Alex, and I want to change it. I've spent most of my life fighting for my country in one way or another and I'm ready now to let someone else take over. It's time I started thinking about myself and what I want."

"And what is it you want?"

"You."

Alex was dumbfounded. "You're serious?"

"I am. I know there's a lot between us but it's not all bad, Alex. I think we'd be good together."

"Together? What are you talking about; together?"

"I don't know; I don't have all the details worked out. I thought maybe we could figure it out as we go along."

"Walter!" Alex chuckled, "You sound like you're proposing!"

"Well, maybe I am; kind of." Walter stammered.

Alex stood, hands on hips, the smile fading from his lips. "You're not saying what it sounds like you're saying."

"I am. I've been thinking. I've got my letter of resignation all ready there in my desk. You say the word and I mail it and the two of us take off."

Alex walked back over to the couch and sat down, rubbing his forehead.

"I decided after you were here last time that the next time I saw you I was going to ask you to go away with me."

"Go away where?" Alex asked still unable to comprehend the situation.

"Hell, I don't know; and I don't care; anywhere you want; anywhere that you would feel safe."

An image of Alex's place flickered through his mind; his safe place with Walter there helping him; the two of them together?

"No, no, NO!" He stood up and started pacing again. "Do you have any idea what the old man would do to you if he found you with me?" He was teetering on the edge of panic now; stalling for time while thoughts raced through his mind. He had never considered for one moment that Walter might have serious feelings for him. Why would he? No one has ever cared for him before. How could he believe this was happening now? And what would it be like to have someone; someone like Walter Skinner caring for him? The two of them living together? Impossible!

"I don't give a damn about the old man. With me out of the bureau, I'd loose access and that's all he's interested in me for anyway. Do you really think he'd come after you?"

"Of course he would. I have information that could take him down and he knows it."

(The two of us together? Walter in my bed every night? Having someone care for me?)

"Have you ever thought of using it?"

"Sure I have; but I'm not crazy. Even if he was put in jail, he'd still have access to people who would be only too happy to take me out." (Walter in my house? In my bed? In my life?)

"Then I guess we'd better make sure he doesn't find us." Walter walked over to his desk and pulled out the letter addressed to Director Janna Cassidy.

"I've got some cash and we can get more from ATMs. We'd need to get a new car. I've got a fake driver's license in my safe that I used last year in Texas." He looked up to see Alex staring at him wide-eyed.

"What do you think?" Walter asked, "You want to take a shot at this? Or is there no interest there at all beyond a quick fuck every few weeks?"

A thousand thoughts raced across his mind; thoughts that he had never allowed himself before. It all came down to could they do it? Could they actually take this mutual attraction between them and turn it into something important; something long-lasting?

"You know what I am, Walter; the kind of life that I've led. I just never dreamed that you might be seriously interested in me. I never imagined a real relationship to be anything that was in the cards for me."

Walter came over to him, caressing his shoulders, neck and cheeks. "It is if you want it to be. We could at least give it a shot; if either of decided it wasn't what we wanted, we could just walk away."

"You're saying you want a life with me; the two of us living together?" Alex still couldn't believe his ears.

"I'm saying that's what I want and I'm asking you if there's any possibility that you might want the same thing?"

Walter kissed him then. It was a strange kiss; different from any they had ever shared before. It was almost…sweet.

Alex drew back; his mind whirling. He had come here tonight, like Walter had said for a quick fuck before he disappeared for good. And now Walter was offering him something that he never dreamed possible.

"So you're not interested?" Walter asked sitting on the corner of his desk and fingering his resignation letter.

"I didn't say that," Alex answered quickly. "I guess I'm just in a state of shock here. Why would you want me? I mean, my God, Walter; you could have anyone you wanted!"

"I want you."

"I…" Alex gulped and walked over to the sliding glass doors and opened one; breathing in the cool air. "I don't know what to say."

Walter came up behind him, slipped his arms around Alex, and rested his chin on his shoulder. "Say 'yes'. Give me a chance to prove to you that we belong together."

Alex turned in his arms and said, "I came here tonight to tell you 'good-bye'; to tell you that I was leaving."

Walter dropped his arms and stepped back; the look on his face as though he'd just been hit with a bucket of ice water.

"I guess I've made a fool out of myself then. I'm sorry." He walked away, his back to Alex.

"No; no you haven't. You just caught me off guard is all. That was the last thing I thought I'd ever hear from you."

Walter refilled his glass and gulped it down. "So where are you headed?" he tried to sound casual; he didn't make it. "Oh that's right. I'm not supposed to ask any questions." He couldn't keep the bitterness and disappointment out of his voice.

They stood there staring at each other for several moments then Alex walked over to him.

"You really want me? Full time?"

"Uh huh. We could go wherever you want; do whatever you want. I'm a pretty good cook; I can do a lot of things besides analyze reports and fuck you into oblivion; in case you're interested."

"Walter, I'm leaving the group. They WILL come after me and if they find me they'll kill me and whoever happens to be with me." Alex warned.

"You'll need someone to watch your back then. We can be careful; find us someplace where they'd never think to look."

"You've got some romantic idea about the two of us living happily ever after? I've never lived with anyone before. Not since college and I pretty much hated that. You've been alone for years and before that you lived with a woman for 17 years. What makes you think the two of us could get along? We could end up hating each other inside of a month."

"Then we'd go our separate ways and say, hey, we tried." Walter insisted.

"I'm not a woman and I won't be treated like one."

"I've spent enough years with a woman to know that's NOT what I want I know what I want and I know who I want. I just have to convince you that I'm what you want; I'm what you need."

"And what if I don't want to be fucked all the time? What if I want to do some fucking?"

He was shocked to hear those words come out of his mouth but it was true. He liked being fucked but sometimes he just need to be the one in control; the one doing the fucking.

Walter grinned at him, "I thought you'd never ask," he said with a sly smile.

"You'd take it?" Alex asked, not believing what he'd just heard.

"I have. It was a long time ago. It's definitely within the realm of possibility."

Alex was dumbfounded. For the second or was it the third time that evening, he was speechless.

"Cat got your tongue?" Walter teased then added, "We've got a lot to learn about each other, Alex. We never have spent all that much time together. I'd like to change that. You said you were leaving tonight. Let me go with you. We could stay together just as long as you wanted. If it doesn't work out then so be it. I think we should at least try and get to know each other a little bit."

"There's a lot you don't know about me, Walter. I've been with…a lot of people."

"So we get you tested. There are a lot of clinics that will test you on a John Doe basis. We can be sure and use protection if that's what you're worried about. I get tested every six months. The last time was three months ago. I'm clean."

"That's not what I meant. I meant I've been with people…some that you know." He wasn't sure how much he should say or if he should say anything at all. He'd never been in this position before but the thought of being with Walter on a 24/7 basis was really beginning to grow on him.

"I don't care who you've been with or how many. I'm asking for a chance here."

"You really want ME; Alex Rat Bastard Krycek? WHY?"

Walter thought about that a minute then answered with a question of his own. "Why do you keep coming back here?"

"Because…I…to get laid." It was an honest answer but he knew it was more than that.

"You and I both know you could get laid anywhere in town. Coming here is a risk; yet you take it time after time; why?"

"OK, OK. We're good together. We've both been through a lot of shit in our lives; we see things alike," Alex admitted.

"Exactly; and you like being with me!" Walter coached.

"YES! I like being with you!" Alex chuckled, "but this other stuff you're talking about; I don't know if I can do it."

"There's one way to find out. Let me leave here with you tonight. There's something there between us, Alex. Let's find out what it is."

"Just like that? You'd up and leave without a word to anyone?"

"I just have to drop that letter in the mail. Anything else I have to do can be done over the phone or by e-mail."

"You couldn't tell anyone where you are; you couldn't have any visitors."

"Not a problem." Walter assured him.

"And if I decide it's not working; you'd leave?"

"If either of us decides it's not working, we'd go our separate ways."

Alex shook his head, "So how do you feel about snow?"

"Love it! I absolutely adore it! Can't get enough of it!"

Alex laughed. "Where I'm going there'll be a ton of it!"

"You'll need someone to chop wood then. I'm great with an ax."

"You'd better go get some warm clothes then." Alex grinned at him; liking this togetherness thing more and more by the minute.

Walter got half way up the stairs then turned and came back down, grabbed Alex's arm and pulled him up the stairs.

"I don't want to take the chance of you changing your mind. I don't want to come back down stairs and find you gone." He deposited Alex in the chair in his bedroom and drug out his suitcase and tossed it on the bed.

Less than an hour later they were on the highway headed north. A light mist was falling and the road was more or less deserted.

"I like your truck," Walter finally said, breaking the silence.

"Thanks," Alex answered smiling over at him. "Wanna drive?"

"Sure, I'd love to."

Alex pulled over to the side of the road and hopped out. Walter did the same and they switched places. Walter pulled back on the highway, admiring the way the truck handled. "Nice!" He smiled.

After a while Alex said, "I'm not going to be easy to get along with."

"Good. I like a challenge." Walter kept his eyes on the road.

After another silence, Alex asked, "Did you mean it when you said I could fuck you?"

"Uh huh. I also meant it when I said it's been a long time; about 20 years ago."

"Shit! That's a long time."

"Uh huh."

They came to an interchange in the highway and Walter asked, "Do I stay on 83?"

"Yeah. Stay on 83 till Harrisburg."

"OK."

"You're not going to ask where we're going?" Alex asked amazed at Walter's silence.

"I'll find out when we get there." Walter answered with a smile.

"I thought we'd stop in Harrisburg and get something to eat." Alex said, gazing out the window at the passing night.

"I could eat," Walter agreed.

"Are you really this cool about everything? You can just take off in the middle of the night and not have any idea where you're going?" Alex asked.

"I trust you Alex. You've got someplace in mind we're heading for and you don't want to tell me where that is right now. You still think I might change my mind and decide I want to go back."

"So you're a mind reader now?"

"No, I'm not a mind reader. You said 'snow'. And we're heading north so I'm guessing it's somewhere in New England. At first I thought Canada but you didn't say anything about passports so I'm guessing we're staying in the US. The exact location isn't important."

"You can still change your mind. I'm sure Cassidy would agree to ignore that letter if you asked her to."

"If things don't work out for us, I'll find something else to do. I'm not going back to the Bureau. I'm through there; I have no intentions of ever going back."

Another long spell of silence and they were on the outskirts of Harrisburg and it was getting light. Walter pulled the truck over and Alex took the wheel as he had asked.

He drove into town and found a little café where they stopped and had breakfast.

Breakfast finished, they lingered over coffee.

"Everything alright? You haven't changed your mind about letting me come along have you?" Walter asked.

"No. I was thinking what route to take. I've taken a different one each time I've come up here and changed vehicles along the way."

"I've been watching, I don't think we're being followed."

"No, I don't think so either. It's just…I've got to ask you something. I've got to ask you for your word that if you decide to leave; you won't give my location to anyone; ANYONE."

"You have it!" Walter assured him.

Alex stared at him, desperately wanting to trust him. He DID trust him; he always had but this was different. He was getting out of the business; OUT, entirely; and here he was taking Walter Skinner with him! Was this the dumbest thing he ever did? Or was there something there; something that could make it all worth while? He was gambling with his life and he knew it.

"Why are you here, Walter? Why'd you want to come with me?"

Walter took a few minutes to formulate his thoughts then said, "I wanted out and I wanted you. Neither of us was in a position to do the whole courtship thing; you know, dating, getting to know one another, all the usual stuff. I had already determined that I definitely wanted to spend more time with you, get to know you better. You showed up and said you were leaving. I didn't want to let you go; not without at least trying to see if there is really something there between us."

"I've never had a steady…relationship with anyone. I'll probably blow it; screw up and you'll end up hating me."

"All I'll ever ask, Alex, is that you be honest with me; nothing more."

"I have a place. I've got it all stocked with supplies enough to last a year. I bought some extra but I don't think there'll be enough for two for that long."

"OK. We should stop then somewhere along the way. I need to buy a vehicle too. I'll get a truck and load it. If you want, I can join you after; we could meet somewhere? Is your place near here? I could go out and do that right now and meet you later?"

"A second truck is a good idea but we don't need to get it just yet. Nothing's open at this hour anyway. My place isn't around here. We still have a long drive. We can stop in Syracuse. There are lots of dealerships along the highway and I know where there's a WalMart where you can stock up. Come on, let's get on the road."

Shortly after 10 am they arrived in Syracuse and pulled into a truck lot. Alex waited in his truck while Walter went in, test drove a dark blue Ford, went back into the building with the man and came our a few minutes later carrying paperwork and a set of keys.

"You want to show me where this WalMart is?" He smiled at Alex and jangled a set of keys in front of him.

"You did remember to use a phony name didn't you?" Alex asked him.

"I used the name of a corporation that I had my attorney set up for me years ago; after I get tangled up with Spender. I figured there might come a time when I'd have to take off. I have ID, bank and credit cards, all in that name; and my retirement check's set up to be automatically deposited into that account."

Alex smiled at him. "Good; follow me."

Walter climbed into his new truck and followed Alex to WalMart.

"I think its best we split up. I'll take care of non-food supplies; you concentrate on stocking up on foods that you like. I have a couple of freezers but they're full so stick to canned goods, dry goods, stuff like that."

"There's a Sears right over there. Why don't we pick up another freezer or two? How far are we from your place?" Walter asked.

"About a hundred miles."

"You think the old man is looking for you already?"

"Probably. He called me last night and I didn't answer the phone."

"Why don't we get the freezers, haul them out to your place then I could come back and get the groceries?"

"OK. That sounds good but we'll both come back. We'll need both trucks to carry it all."

"I think what we need is a trailer. Hold on here a minute and I'll call that guy who sold me the truck. I have his card right here. He fumbled in his pocket and produced the card. Maybe he knows where we might be able to find one around here." Walter pulled out his cell phone and punched the number in.

A few minutes later he had directions and they were off; just a couple of miles down the road. They picked out the biggest one they could find, a used Haulmark a couple of years old; 8 X 12, covered, with plenty of room to stack all the additional supplies they would need. They had a heavy duty hitch hooked up on Walter's truck and headed back for some major shopping.

First they went to the Sears and bought two of the largest freezers they had in stock and had them loaded into their trailer. They also bought an appliance dolly so they could do the unloading themselves and didn't have to worry about having them delivered.

Next was a king sized bed for Walter, along with bedding, extra towels. Walter suggested a second washer/dryer set up which they also purchased and had loaded up. Then they headed to the clothing department and Walter selected an entire wardrobe; jeans, flannel shirts, sweat suits, jackets, underwear, socks, boots, and heavy duty jacket and work gloves. He debated going over to the tool department but decided he could wait on that.

Then it was back to WalMart for the food. They filled four carts, each pushing one and pulling another; then went back and did it all again until they were convinced they wouldn't need to do any more shopping for months; hopefully a year. They loaded up and headed out to Alex's place.

It was late afternoon and the sky was already beginning to darken. It had turned cold and the air had the bite of frost in it. They took a quick spin around the place before it got all the way dark then headed to the house to unload. It took them a solid hour to get everything inside and in some sort of order. They hauled the bed and bedding upstairs to a room across the hall from Alex's bedroom and set it up; then went downstairs looking for something to eat for dinner.

They opened some cans of stew for dinner and ate it with some bread and fresh fruit for dessert; sitting across from one another at the small kitchen table.

"I'm really uneasy about this, Walter. I've never lived with anyone before; not on a 24/7 basis."

"It'll be OK, Alex. Just do whatever you would be doing if I wasn't here."

"The first thing I planned on doing is getting the cameras installed. The computer is already set up. I did manage to get all the wiring done around the perimeter which took me nearly a year to complete. I only came up here when the old man was out of town. I can show you how to install them; it's not difficult and with your help, it shouldn't take all that long to get them up."

"Good. I've done some wiring before but never with cameras. It should be interesting."

"It is actually."

"What about the fence?" Walter asked.

"I did have a new one put up all around the perimeter but all that will keep out is animals. It's just the standard farm fencing, not a security fence. I figured that would throw up too many red flags to the locals. I've got other ideas for security that we can go into later."

"Good thinking." Walter agreed.

"We need to be careful. You retiring at the exact same time as me disappearing might rouse some suspicion. He'll probably be looking for you too. He's going to be really pissed that he lost his AD."

"Good! The thought of pissing the old man off pleases me no end!"

They shared a laugh as they washed up their few dishes.

"I think we need a fire," Alex said as they walked into the living room. He set about lighting the fire he had laid and they sat on the couch watching it catch and slowly work itself into a blaze.

"I love a fire," Walter said leaning back, long legs stretched out in front of him, crossed at the ankles. "You get all that wood here on the place?"

"Yeah, I did. There's an old tractor out in that barn. I tinkered with it and got it working; it runs pretty good. I drove it out to a downed tree; wrapped a chain around it and drug it back to the barn. I have a chain saw and trimmed it; sawed it to size and bought a log splitter. It works really well."

"Good. We should get some more as soon as we get the cameras up. Is the house pretty sound?"

"Yeah, it is. I was surprised. I checked it out thoroughly; doesn't look like there's ever been a water leak. I had a new roof installed and the fireplace checked out and repaired. Foundation looks as sound as it was when the place was built; not a crack in sight."

"Did you put in the central heat?"

"Uh huh. The place had small gas heaters in every room but I had them taken out and a new heating/cooling system installed. I didn't want to have to rely on the fireplace alone for heat."

"Good idea. A fireplace is great but there's just nothing like central heating." Walter agreed; hands laced together behind his head.

Alex got up to stir the fire and add another log. He stood with his back to the fire and looked at Walter, sitting on his couch, relaxed and smiling at him. Something inside him began to heat up. A small tiny bit of warmth flushed over him. The two of them, here, along, together; no one to interrupt, no phones to answer; just the two of them, alone.

Walter stood and said, "I don't know about you, but I'm beat. I'd like to take a shower. How's the hot water heater in this place; big enough for two showers?"

"Yeah, it's new too. Plenty of hot water; help yourself."

"Thanks," Walter said as he headed up the stairs. He decided to put the sheets and blankets on the bed first then grabbed an old sweat suit out of his bag and headed for the shower at the end of the hall.

The shower felt good and revived him somewhat considering he had had no sleep the night before, he felt remarkably invigorated. The sight of Alex coming down the hall towards the bathroom for a shower of his own; definitely stirred things up inside him.

He left his door opened and lay down on his bed; the small lamp on the bedside table still on. His thoughts lingered on Alex. He wondered if this would work out. He wanted it to. There was just something about Alex that touched him; strange feelings he had never experienced before; not with Sharon and not with any of the others he had been with over the years. There was something there between them. He didn't know what it was but it both excited and intrigued him. He just couldn't seem to get enough of being with him, talking with him, and just looking at him. There was something about the way Alex moved, the way he tilted his head when he spoke; the way he cast his eyes downward then look suddenly up with those incredible green eyes. And those eyelashes; he had to laugh because it made him think of Sharon and all her false eyelashes, trying to make hers look longer and fuller and here Alex had it all. And he was handsome! There was no question about that. Even with his injured arm, he had a body that most men would envy. Long and lean; although far too many scars that Walter didn't even want to think about how he'd gotten them. It certainly didn't detract from the beauty that was Alex Krycek; in fact, it only made him more appealing.

"Can't sleep?" A refreshed Alex asked from the doorway.

"Just thinking. I'm a lucky man." Walter smiled up at him and reached out a hand.

"I don't know about that," Alex answered as he came on into the room, took Walter's hand and sat on the side of the bed. "You look pretty tired."

"I am. So are you."

"You're right about that. Is your bed comfortable?"

"Yeah; real nice; you want to try it out?" Walter asked leaning up on one elbow.

"I plan on it; just not tonight. I think we both need a good night's sleep." He smiled.

"You're probably right about that. It's been a long day – two days."

"Yeah; long but good."

"I'm glad you feel that way. This is going to work, Alex. I just have a feeling about it."

"I hope you're right," Alex answered as he got up and walked to the doorway.

"I am. You'll see starting tomorrow. We'll get those cameras installed then we can relax a little and get organized."

"Get some sleep now."

"I will; you too; night," Walter said as he turned off the lamp.

"Night," Alex answered and went to his own room across the hall. He fell into bed and into a sound sleep, not allowing himself to think about the man sleeping just across the hall.

The next morning Walter awoke to the smell of coffee, and what was that – bacon? He got dressed in an old pair of jeans and boots and slipped a Henley on over his head. Bathroom first and a quick shave and tooth brushing and he hurried down the stairs.

"Morning, sleepy head," Alex greeted him from the stove. "How do you like your eggs?"

"Over easy. Damn! That smells good." Walter said reaching for the coffee pot and pouring himself a cup.

"We've got a lot of work to do this morning and I figured we'd do it better if we had a big breakfast to fortify us."

"Is that hash browns?" Walter lifted the lid on a frying pan on the back burner.

"Yep. We didn't eat much yesterday so we need to make up for it today; or at least this morning. Don't know how we'll feel about a big meal after working outdoors all day."

"You did breakfast, I'll do lunch. We can decide what we want to eat then." Walter took the plate of eggs that Alex handed him and filled it with bacon, hash browns and toast then took a seat at the table. Alex joined him minutes later with a full plate of his own.

With breakfast quickly gobbled down, the dishes washed, dried and put away, they started sorting through the boxes of cameras and loading them onto their trucks. Alex had a small stash of tools; enough to get the job done and he showed Walter exactly how they were to be installed. They worked diligently throughout the day, stopping only for a quick lunch and a check to see if they were receiving signals from those cameras already installed; they were. They worked front to back; side to side to make sure they had at least some security on all sides before going back and filling in the blank spots.

"You got some extras?" Walter asked noticing there were still several boxes of cameras left after they had finished.

"Yeah, those are for around the house up close." Alex said as he was checking the monitors he had set up to see if all the cameras were working.

"What's this; motion detectors?" Walter asked checking out some of the other boxes in the room.

"Uh huh. I like motion detectors; so I would at least know if someone was out there."

"Good idea. Why don't we plan on setting them up tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow's good."

"If we need anything, I could go into town. With a cap on, I look pretty much like everybody else. I think we should stay away from the small towns. The larger towns; no one knows you or asks any questions." Walter suggested.

Walter cooked dinner that night. Baked chicken with vegetables and a salad. They figured and talked and planned all through dinner.

They did a little rearranging of all their supplies, having plenty of empty rooms to stash it all in. There were six rooms downstairs, three on each side of a long hall that ran from the front to the back of the house. On one side was the living room, dining room and kitchen; and on the other side was two rooms the brochure had called the front and back parlors and a bathroom at the back. The upstairs pretty much matched the lower floor; three rooms on each side of the long hall; bathroom at the end. Alex's bedroom was right next to the bathroom and Walter's was across the hall from him. That left three empty rooms upstairs that could also be used for storage.

The front parlor Alex had set up as a combination computer room and library with boxes and boxes of books he had been hauling up there and a stack of un-assembled book cases ready and waiting. In the back parlor, Alex had assembled shelving and stacked his supplies all neatly organized. Now they had to add all Walter's supplies and do some re-arranging to make room for everything. The four huge freezers were out on one side of the screened in back porch; the other side held several racks for firewood. Only one was partially full.

They finished their arranging and Walter announced that he was heading upstairs for a shower. Alex made one last check of the monitors and headed on up as well. Walter came out of the bathroom and Alex went in for his shower.

He stood under the steaming hot water and let it run down over his tired body; head first, then shoulders, body arms and legs. He reached for the soap and started scrubbing up. He had just stuck his head under for a rinsing when he heard the bathroom door open. He could see the shadow through the curtain and figured Walter needed to use the toilet. He waited a minute and went rigid when the shower curtain was pulled back and Walter stepped in behind him.

"I thought you might need some help washing your back." He said, sliding his arms around Alex's body and nuzzling the back of his neck.

Alex stood stiff as a board, saying nothing.

"What's the matter?" Walter asked between little kisses up the side of Alex's neck.

"My arm…Walter…please." No one had ever seen him without his prosthesis.

"Hmmmm? This arm?" Walter asked rubbing up and down Alex's good right arm.

"No!"

"This arm?" Walter reached around and grasped Alex's limp cock.

"No!" He couldn't help but chuckle.

"Oh. You mean this arm?" He kissed Alex's left shoulder.

"I need it!" The heat of the shower, the warmth of the man behind him caressing him softened his fears.

"I'll get it." Walter said and stepped out of the tub and reached for the prosthesis sitting on the toilet tank then got back in and handed it to him.

Alex quickly fastened it on.

"OK now?"

"Yeah."

"This arm OK?" He caressed the plastic arm.

"Uh huh."

"This one too?" He caressed the right arm.

"Yeah"

"What about this one? Ooooohh. I think this one is growing. Must be all that hard work you did today." He caressed the cock that was no longer limp.

"You're crazy, you know that?" Alex asked leaning back into Walter's arms and letting his head rest on Walter's shoulder.

"Uh huh. It's a secret though. Can you keep a secret?" His left hand worked its way up Alex's chest and was fingering a flat brown nipple into a rigid nub.

"I've been known to keep a secret or two." Alex turned around in his arms and kissed him; a long deep tongue searching kiss that was eagerly returned.

Walter turned them around and Alex was backed up to the wall. Down on his knees he buried his face in Alex's damp groin and began a tortuous session of licking and sucking.

Alex braced himself against the wall and hung on while Walter busied himself giving him the best blow-job he'd ever had. When he regained his senses Walter was standing in front of him holding him up and saying something.

"I really like doing that. If you don't mind, I'd like to do it as often as possible." He smiled and pulled Alex into his arms.

"Mind? No…I don't mind at all; any time." His brain was still addled,

They climbed out of the tub and dried off. Alex led the way this time; taking Walter by the hand and leading him into his room.

"My room OK?" Alex asked, "I have supplies; night stand drawer," he said lying down on the bed and pulling Walter down on top of him.

"Any place; any time, any where, any reason." Walter lay down on top of Alex, grinding their bodies together and mumbled into the side of Alex's neck as he spread a trail of damp little kisses down to a nipple where he stopped and teased it with his tongue before nipping at it with his teeth and sucking it in. A long slow make-out session followed before he finally entered Alex; face up with legs over Walter's shoulders. Walter knew what he was doing and in moments had Alex twisting and turning and gasping; clutching at him begging for more. Neither of them lasted very long. Once Alex grunted his release, Walter allowed himself the pleasure of the same.

They lay together for a time while they waited for the world to stop spinning and they came back down to earth.

Walter got up and went into the bathroom. He cleaned himself up, put his sweat suit back on and brought a wet cloth and towel back to Alex.

"Thanks," Alex said and cleaned himself while Walter stood at the door and watched.

When he was finished, Walter held a hand out and Alex tossed him the rag and towel. He bundled it up and carried it back to the bathroom, hanging them on the side of the tub. He came back out and stood a moment in Alex's doorway; gazing at him.

"Sleepy?" He asked.

"I am now." Alex answered dreamily.

"Good. We've got a lot of work tomorrow. Good night."

"Night," Alex answered and his last thought before he drifted off to sleep was that this living together thing might not be all that bad after all.

The next several days were filled with a lot of hard work and the evenings with hot sex. They took turns with the cooking and both cleaned up afterwards. They got the motion detectors and the remainder of the cameras installed and relaxed a few days.

Next came the re-supplying of the firewood. The news was saying it was going to be one of the coldest winters on record and they wanted to be prepared. They first worked on the back porch and made sure it was capable of handling the load. It had previously been propped up but they did a better job of it and made it secure.

"Tomorrow we can concentrate next on filling that back porch with fire wood." Walter was saying one evening after dinner.

"Yeah," Alex agreed. "And if the winter's going to be that bad, maybe we should move those freezers inside. We've got plenty of room in out storage room. The only reason I put them out there to begin with is that's where the old one was located when I bought the place."

"I wondered about that. I think that's a good idea. That will also give us more room for firewood."

The next day it rained so they spent the time moving the freezers inside, putting the book cases together and stocking them, eating, reading, baking bread, and having sex.

The next morning they got an early start, dragging downed trees up to their barn; trimming, cutting to size and splitting for firewood. A solid week's work and they had the back porch loaded.

"That should be enough to last us two years at least," Alex laughed as he wiped his brow on his shirt sleeve.

"Good! Then if we don't feel like doing this again next year; we won't have to." Walter smiled beside him as they admired their work.

As if on cue, the snow started to fall in large flakes, settling on their hats and shoulders.

They hurried inside to the smell of yeast bread baking in the oven and a stew simmering on the stove.

They ate from bowls on the couch in front of a blazing fire; each lost in his own thoughts, staring into the flames; amazed at their contentment. A quick clean up of the kitchen, a short fun shower, then on to bed.

"Oh man!" Alex said after a particularly hot session, "Why didn't you tell me this living together would be so great!" He rolled over and pillowed his head against Walter's furred chest.

"I knew it would be good but I had no idea it could be THIS good!" Walter answered still breathless from exertion as his fingers combed through Alex's dark hair.

"You realize we've been here nearly two months already? It's almost Thanksgiving." Alex pulled the covers up over them.

"I was thinking about that last night as I was taking the steaks out of the freezer and saw the turkey. We need to remember to take it out a few days early so it can defrost." He pulled the covers further up around Alex's shoulders and held him close. "You feel a little bit better now about security?"

"Yeah, I really do. Much more so than I thought I would."

"Good. I'm glad." Those were Walter's last words before he dozed off.

Thanksgiving came and together they worked on the dinner, side by side in the kitchen working on bread and pies and turkey and vegetables. It was a first for both of them and they enjoyed themselves thoroughly; their initial awkwardness long since passed. They had found that they were very compatible. Both were hard workers and more than willing to handle their share of the load and more.

They settled in, snug in their warm home; fireplace going from morning till night. They stayed vigilant and drove the perimeter of their place every day and kept a close eye on their monitors.

Their TV told of blizzards in the area and lake effect snow and the drifts mounted higher and higher outside. Christmas came and they brought in a little tree and decorated it with decorations they made from Reynolds Wrap and popcorn and other small items they found around the house. There were no gifts under the tree but they didn't seem to notice or care. They hadn't been off the property in weeks but neither of them gave it any thought.

They were sleeping together now in the same bed; either Alex's or Walter's; just wherever they ended up. They woke up each morning wrapped around each other and ready to start the new day. They were lovers now though neither of them ever used the word. They were just there, together, and it didn't need any defining or explanations. They were where they wanted to be; safe and secure and enjoying a life of leisure.

They made great plans for the spring. A vegetable garden and some fruit trees and some landscaping and maybe a trip into Syracuse to get a couple of dogs. They discovered they both loved animals and had always wanted some and were determined to go to the animal shelter and get a few.

January and February passed with snowball fights, building snow men (anatomically correct snowmen) and sex in the barn, on the back porch, in the kitchen, on the rug in front of the fireplace, on the stairs, in the shower and every morning in bed. They watched their big screen TV, read books that Alex had stock-piled, cooked and baked and fell asleep every night wrapped in each other's arms. Life was good.

Walter came into the study one morning after putting away the last of the breakfast dishes to find Alex brooding at his computer.

"You all right?" he asked coming over and sitting on the corner of the desk.

"No. I just checked in on the Bureau." Alex answered frowning.

"Something going on?"

"Yeah. Mulder. He's missing."

"Missing? Did you get any details?"

"Just that Cassidy is sending out feelers in all directions looking for him. Scully's all over the place too putting out messages looking for him."

"Did you find out how long he's been gone?" Walter asked coming around to see the screen Alex was reading from.

"A little over a week."

"He could be off on one of his wild goose chases," Walter opined.

"Possibly but Scully and Cassidy know that as well as we do and they are both looking for him."

"Have you been able to find out what he was working on?" Walter asked.

"Apparently he had just finished up a case and was at home working on his computer writing up the report when he just disappeared."

"Shit!" Walter said and began pacing the room. "So what are you thinking? You want to go look for him? You have any idea who might take him? You think the old man has him?"

"I don't know. Any of that is possible but, yeah, I think I should go and see if I can find him."

"OK but it's 'WE' not just you. We both go."

"There's no need for you to go, Walter. It could be dangerous; a trap for me maybe."

"All the more reason for me to go."

"I won't be going through official channels, Walter."

"That's all right. I'm still going with you."

"OK, on one condition. What I say goes. Can you agree to that?"

"You got it. I'm just there to back you up."

"OK. Let's throw a few things together and take off."

It was dark when they arrived in DC and they stopped in an alley and ate some of the food they brought along with them. Alex had Walter wait outside while he slipped into a building that he knew the old man had used before to hold people in the past. It didn't take long and he was back outside. No luck. They tried three labs that were in the area and started on a round of the warehouses down by the docks that the old man owned.

They parked a few blocks away and crept quietly up to each warehouse. They made entrance and searched the place; nothing. They searched four warehouses in the area without any luck and were about ready to give up.

"Maybe the old man doesn't have him. Maybe someone else took him." Alex said quietly as they stood trying to decide where to go next.

"What's that?" Walter said ducking down and looking down the street. He pulled Alex back into the shadows.

"What did you see?" Alex asked his hand flexing and ready to draw his gun.

"A light; like a flashlight. Did we check that building out over there?" He pointed to the building at the end of the block.

"No, it's not the old man's; or at least it wasn't. He could have bought it; I guess. Are you sure you saw something?" He craned his neck but couldn't see anything but darkness coming from the windows.

"Positive. Whether it's the old man's or not, we need to check it out."

They eased their way across the street and down to the building. A moments work on the back door and they were in. They made their way up to the second floor where Walter had seen the light. At the top of the stairs they heard voices; two men talking. They peeked around the corner and saw them sitting in front of a door; a small battery operated light between them. There was a crate between them and they were playing cards.

"How do you want to play this?" Walter asked nervous and excited to be back in action again.

"We need a distraction; get them away from the door."

"You want me to go downstairs and knock some stuff around?"

"Wait a minute; where's that guy going?" They looked again and one of the guys had left heading down the back hall. They circled around and followed him down the hall, around a corner and into a restroom.

The guy was unzipped and relieving himself when they came in on him. In seconds they had him bound with duct tape and out of commission. They silently worked their way back to the other guy. He sat there shuffling the cards.

They each went to opposite ends of the corridor. Walter made a noise and the guy started dealing and called out, "It's about time you got back, Charlie. What'd you do, whack off while you were in there?"

Alex snuck up behind him and knocked him out cold with the butt of his gun. Walter set to work with the tape they had brought along. Alex did his magic with the lock and in a minute was inside.

Mulder was tied to a chair; a gag in his mouth. He was frantic. Alex worked the ropes loose and pulled the gag off.

"You came for me! I knew you would! I knew you'd find me!" Mulder was babbling.

"It's OK. You're OK now." Alex was trying to soothe him.

The last of the ropes tossed aside and Mulder threw himself into Alex's arms. "I knew you'd come for me. I love you, Alex. I love you! I knew you'd find me." He was hugging and kissing Alex.

Alex managed to get loose but not before he saw the look on Walter's face as he stood in the doorway watching them. The pain in his eyes cut Alex to the bone. He had to get out of here; he had to explain.

"Come on. Let's get you out of here." He pulled on Mulder's arm but Mulder kept trying to hug him. When he untangled from Mulder's embrace Walter was gone. He got Mulder out into the hall and down the stairs. Mulder babbling all the way, telling him how much he loved him and how things were going to be different and Alex trying to shush him all the way.

Walter was waiting for them behind the wheel of their rental car they had parked on the next block. They got into the back seat; Mulder refusing to let go of him.

Alex was trying to get a few questions answered but Mulder barely heard them. He kept going on and on about how much he missed Alex and how glad he was that Alex was back and how he'd had plenty of time to think about things and he didn't ever want to let Alex out of his sight again.

Alex sat silently, burning inside with regret that he hadn't told Walter about being with Mulder. It just hadn't seemed important at the time; but from the look on Walter's face, and his stony silence, hearing Mulder declare his love was the last thing he expected.

Mulder didn't want to go to a hospital, didn't want to go to Scully's, or the Hoover; he just wanted to go home. Once they got there, he asked that Alex come up with him.

Alex refused but Mulder insisted it would only take a few moments and that he needed him to come up and check out the apartment with him. Alex gave in and went up telling Walter that he would be right back down; five minutes tops.

Walter sat in the dark and waited. He tried to clear his mind; not think about the fact that his lover was upstairs with someone who had just professed his undying love for him. He watched the clock and waited.

He cleared his mind of all thought like he had taught himself to do in Nam. He closed his eyes and thought about the brilliant blue sky, the jungle so green it hurt your eyes to look at it for very long. He thought about sounds; like the snoring of his buddies, or of the shuffling of the cards they played with. He thought about the whump, whump, whump of the chopper coming to carry them to safety. He cleared his mind and didn't think about his three dead buddies lying next to him on the ground. Buddy Sullivan who would never pitch for the minor leagues again, or Artie O'Conner and his wallet full of pictures of his girlfriend Teresa who he was planning on marrying next leave, or of Lucky Atkins whose luck finally ran out and no more poker games for him to play. He batted the flies away and waited. He waited for the chopper; he waited for Alex.

Another look at the clock showed 15 minutes had gone by. Just 15 minutes and it seemed like a lifetime.

Again he cleared his mind and remembered walking down the aisle with Sharon. There must have been at least 500 people there watching them take their vows. He remembered searching through the crowd for his friends; Lt. Gene Hackman, Pfcs Bruce McClaren, Chuck Walker, his best buddy Tommy Lee and their medic Tony Green. They were all that was left of his unit and they had all said they would come. They balked when Sharon insisted that they show up in uniform. They were out of the service now and never wore their uniforms at all for any reason.

Finally he noticed them, they were in the back row, all dressed in camouflage. He remembered laughing out loud and Sharon hissing curses under her breath. She hated them all from that day on and never spoke a word to any of them ever again.

He should have listened to them. They all told him Sharon was not for him but he was too stubborn.

He checked the clock again. 20 minutes had passed. He ran a hand over his tired face and wondered what they were doing up there then just as quickly as that thought formed; he dismissed it. He refused to think about it. Alex was his! Or was he? It had only been four months. Not long enough. And Mulder could be very persuasive. Oh shit! They had come so far in the last four months. Was it possible he could lose it all now? And to Mulder? He shuddered at the thought and worked at clearing his mind again.

Mulder was a good man and he liked and respected him but as a rival for Alex's affections? He couldn't bring himself to make that leap. The worst part of it all was, he was helpless to do anything about it. It was all in Alex's hands; Alex's life to decide which one he wanted. Would he choose Mulder? Had he already made that decision?

Walter looked at the clock again. 30 minutes had passed; 30 of the longest minutes in his life. He keyed the ignition then he drove to his apartment in Crystal City.

The place seemed musty and cold. He could hardly believe it had been over four months since he had last been there. He turned the thermostat up and went upstairs for a shower.

He stood there with the hot water running over his body and wondered how his life had gotten so complicated. He had always been in control of his life and now it seemed to be slipping through his fingers and he was helpless to stop it. Mulder and Alex; Mulder and Alex; the thought kept going through his head. Why didn't he see it? Why didn't he even suspect? Alex has said he had been with people that Walter knew, he remembered that conversation; he just never expected it to be Mulder; never!

"Mulder, I have to leave. You need to call Scully, tell her you're OK." Alex tried to make his way to the door but Mulder held on to him, begging him to stay.

"Please, Alex, don't leave. We need to talk. I've done a lot of thinking and I don't want to go on like this."

"It's not too late, Mulder. You can still make a life for yourself; you and Scully and the baby."

"Alex, please sit down; just for a minute. You want some pizza? I've got some in the freezer. It'll only take a minute."

"No, Mulder, I don't want any pizza; I need to leave and you have phone calls to make."

"And what should I tell Scully? Do I tell her that I love her but that I'm in love with you?"

"Mulder…"

"Can't you just sit with me a minute; hear what I have to say?"

Alex perched on the arm of the sofa; still trying to get away; to get back to Walter.

"Mulder, you need to call Scully and let her know you're alright."

"Do I tell her that the few times I've been with her, I closed my eyes and pretended it was you?"

"I had no idea…"

"I thought they were going to kill me, Alex. I didn't see any way out this time. I just…kept thinking, what was it all for? I mean, all these years, wasted; searching for the truth about what happened in the past; what they hell for? It's over and done with. My sister's dead, my mother's dead, my father's dead; they're all gone. What difference does it make how or why? Whatever I find out won't change my life any."

"I don't have any answers for you. These things you have to figure out yourself."

"That's what I've been doing these last two weeks. My biggest regret was that I never told you how I felt about you. I know what I need to do and I know who I want to do it with. I want you, Alex. We're good together. We could go off somewhere; start over; just the two of us."

Alex stood up and began to pace. "That's impossible and you know it. What about your work? What about Scully and the baby?"

"Scully knows I'm not ever going to be able to marry her. She and the baby will always be an important part of my life but you're the one I want, Alex. I meant what I said, I love you."

Alex just stared at him and wondered how he got himself in this mess. He never thought for a minute that Mulder was developing feelings for him. He thought their being together was nothing but sex. That's what it was for him; he was sure it was the same with Mulder. Apparently he was wrong. He was getting the feeling that this was pay-back for his own self-indulgence.

"Mulder, I'm sorry if you thought that my coming here was anything more than…just sex."

"Oh it was more than sex, Alex. You know that. We shared information, sure, but there was more than that." Mulder leaned back on the couch; fingers laced together behind his head.

"Mulder…" He didn't know what to say.

"You came here because you wanted to, Alex, you wanted me. And I wanted you too and it was good; you can't deny that. If it wasn't you wouldn't have kept coming back."

Did he tell him it started out all a part of his job? Would that hurt him even more? He didn't know what to do or say.

"Mulder, it's late. Why don't you make those calls; at least call Scully. Then get a good night's sleep. You'll have a better perspective on all this in the morning."

Mulder got up and came over to him. "Yeah, I could use some sleep; why don't you join me? We could take a shower then…" He slid a hand up Alex's chest. Alex caught it and pulled away.

"Mulder, there's just no easy way to tell you this. I'm out of the business now; I'm retired."

"That's great, we could find something to do together; maybe open a security consulting firm or something."

"No, Mulder there is no 'we'; no 'us'. I'm on my own now and I plan on staying that way."

"But you'll still come and see me? Maybe more often now that you're out of the business. We could do more things?"

"Mulder, there's someone else. I'm living with someone; it's an exclusive deal."

Mulder looked as though he'd been stricken; his face clouded over.

"Someone else?"

"I'm sorry. I never meant for you to think that we were going to have some kind of 'relationship' here. It was just sex, Mulder. That's all it was. If you thought it was more than that, then I apologize."

"Does he give you what I do? Huh? Is he as good as I am? What's he got that I don't?"

Mulder was becoming defensive.

"Mulder, lets not do this. Lets not make it worse that it already is."

"I thought…I guess it doesn't matter what I thought, does it?" Mulder stared at him.

"Look; you're back home safe and sound; doesn't that count for something?"

"Yes it does. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you. They'd still have me; doing whatever they wanted with me. But you came for me! You found me! So I'm supposed to think all that meant nothing?"

"It means that I heard you were missing and I came looking for you and found you. It's nothing monumental. I thought I could find you and I did. That's all there was to it."

"So I mean nothing to you at all; just someone to fuck when you're in the mood?"

Alex shivered at how cold and calloused that sounded. The worst part of it was recognizing the truth in it. That's exactly what the relationship was all about as far as he was concerned. The guilt left him disgusted with himself.

"You always did say I was a Rat Bastard." Alex shook his head and took a few steps towards the door.

"You liked what you got here, Alex. You'll be back and you'll come to realize that I mean more to you than you think. You got some guy giving you everything you want

right now but how long do you think that will last? Sooner or later one of you will screw up and it'll all be over. When that happens, you'll be back. I'll be waiting." He followed Alex to the door.

"I'm sorry, Mulder. Really, I am." Alex tried one last time to apologize.

"Me too. I do love you, Alex, and I think deep down you love me too. I'll wait; however long it takes."

Alex opened the door, "Make those calls." He said and left the apartment. He hurried downstairs but the street was empty; Walter was gone.

Alex felt like shit. He walked the few blocks to the nearest bus stop and hopped a ride. Two transfers and he was on his way to Crystal City. He wondered what all Walter had heard. It didn't really matter. From the look on his face, he had heard enough. He really screwed up big time. He should have told Walter. He should have but he didn't.

He took the freight elevator up to the seventeenth floor and waited until the corridor was empty then hurried to Walter's apartment. He knocked quietly then rang the bell. There was no answer. He slipped his device out of his wallet and in a second the door was opened.

He stepped inside, everything was quiet. The lights were on but Walter was no where in sight.

"Walter?" He called out. "Hey, you upstairs?" He took the stairs two at a time and headed for the master bedroom where he could see the light shining through the open door.

"I finally got Mulder settled down…" He stopped dead in his tracks as he walked through the door. The blood drained from his face as he saw Walter bound and gagged on the floor; two men standing there either side of the door with guns pointed at him; the old man inhaling a lungful of smoke gloating over it all.

"Well now, isn't this a surprise," the slimy voice ran cold chills up his spine. "I'm surprised at you, Alex; that you'd fall for such an old trick. You must be loosing your touch." He flicked his ashes onto the carpet.

"What do you want?" Alex asked, his entire body rigid with fear. All he could think about was that the old man had managed to lure him back with the oldest trick in the book! He was past being disgusted; he was furious with himself and with Mulder for delaying him so that Walter walked into this all alone and that he was standing there in the middle of another shitty situation that he had no control over.

"You've been absent from work for months now. Don't you think I have reason to be upset?"

"Look, I'm out of it now. I've got no ax to grind, I'm not giving up any information, I just want to be left alone." He wondered if his reflexes had gone to hell too along with his brain. He calculated the distance to where the two men were standing. He watched their eyes; they were watching him and not their boss. Damn!

"You've been a naughty boy, Alex. You know what happens to naughty boys! Now are you going to come along nicely or shall I have my men work over your sugar-daddy here?" He nodded towards Walter. Walter was wide-eyed and frantic, nodding 'no'.

"I'll go quietly if you give me your word you'll leave him alone." Alex bargained with the only thing his had; himself.

"You have it. He's nothing to me now that he's run off and quit like a sniveling coward."

He dropped his cigarette to the floor and stepped on it mashing it into the carpet.

"OK. Let's go then," Alex backed out of the room drawing the three of them with him.

"Guns first; then knife. On the floor over there." The old man pointed to a spot on the floor across the room.

Alex slipped his gun slowly out of its holster, the other two closed in on him holding their guns point blank. He tossed his gun to the floor then reached for his ankle holster and tossed it.

"Knife," the old man reminded him.

He pulled his knife out and tossed it on the bed next to Walter. The old man watched and shrugged. "Let's go. No tricks now or we come back up here and take care of him."

"You have my word," Alex answered. "You leave him alone; I go with you."

The four of them left.

Walter rolled over and inched his way over to the knife. He fumbled with it but got it opened and in minutes was cutting himself free. He grabbed both of Alex's guns and headed for the elevator. By the time he got downstairs, there was no sight of them. Alex was gone; the old man had him!

Skinner pounded on the door for the third time; this time with his fist. Finally a light came on and the door opened a crack.

"Skinner? What is it? I was just taking a shower." Mulder closed the door, unchained it and opened it again.

Walter strode into the room out of breath, "They got him. Alex. The old man got him."

"What? What are you talking about? He works for the old man."

"Not any more. He hasn't in months. He quit the same time I retired. You've got to help me find him." He was pacing the floor.

"He quit the group? I thought nobody ever quit the Consortium." Mulder said, wiping at the water running down his neck from his wet hair and pulled his bathrobe tighter around him.

"They don't. But Alex did. Now they've got him back. Get dressed. You've got to help me find him." Walter said impatiently.

"Now wait a minute here. Hold on. Alex quit the group and you retired at the same time? What's the connection there that I'm missing?"

"Alex and I. We're living together now."

"YOU? You and Alex?" Mulder couldn't believe his ears. "But…no way! I don't believe it!"

"Believe what you want, Mulder, you usually do. But they've got him and you're going to help me find him."

"Why me? I just got back myself!"

"I KNOW that! And who the hell found you? ALEX did; that's who! I've got no one else to turn to. You owe him, Mulder and you owe me!"

"Give me a minute to get dressed. Do you have any idea where they'd take him?" Mulder said as he walked into his bedroom and started dressing.

"Not a clue. I was hoping you might have some ideas."

"He used to have an apartment over on 183rd Street but that was years ago and I doubt he'd take Alex there. How did the two of you find me?"

"Alex knew of some warehouses that they owned. We searched several before we found the building you were in."

Mulder came out of the room carrying his shoes and socks and sat down on the couch and put them on.

"What did the old man say when he took him? Did he give any clues at all?"

"None. He just made some crack about Alex being a naughty boy and that he knew what happened to naughty boys."

Mulder stared off into space trying to recall a distant memory. "He said something to me…long ago. Something about the old man calling him a naughty boy…can't remember."

"You've got to remember! THINK, Mulder! What was it?"

"He said they got taken behind the barn and whipped. I didn't take him seriously though; I never saw any scars on his back," he looked away, embarrassed, "did you?"

"No, I didn't but I wasn't looking. Does the old man own a farm or a ranch? Someplace that might have a barn?"

"The Englishman used to raise horses somewhere around here; remember that Doctor was killed there?"

"Yeah, I remember. Where was that place? Do you know?"

"No, but it should be on file somewhere." Mulder got on his computer and pulled up the file. "Here it is. It's about two hours south of here; off route 95."

"Let's go!" Walter picked up Mulder's jacket off the back of his desk chair and tossed it to him.

"Now wait a minute. Aren't you the one always telling me not to go off half-cocked? He could still be in town. He could be anywhere. The Englishman is dead. We don't even know if the group still owns that place or not."

"Do you have any other places we could look?" Walter asked, hands on hips and aggravated by Mulder's stalling.

"No. I don't. Here's the directions." He handed Walter the paper the printer put out and they were out the door and on their way.

They drove in silence for a while then Walter spoke. "Are you OK? Did they hurt you?"

"I'm fine," Mulder answered, "Just tired. I haven't slept much the last several days."

"What do you think we're going to find once we get there? Any ideas?"

"No. Could be about anything. I wouldn't think there would be much in the way of man-power though. Being way out here, there'd be no need for it."

"Have you ever been out to this place?" Walter asked hopefully.

"No. We'll just have to play it by ear."

"Are you armed?"

"Yeah. I don't feel dressed unless I have my holster on. You?"

"Yeah. I'm all set. I have my gun, and both of Alex's plus his knife."

"Maybe we'll get lucky and we won't have to use them."

"Yeah, that would be nice. We can't count on it though. I intend to use whatever force is necessary to bring him back. I'm not leaving without him."

Mulder was silent for a time then said, "So how long have the two of you been seeing one another?"

"For about a year and a half. We've been living together for four months. I take it, you were seeing him too?"

"Uh huh. Not seriously though. Just occasionally."

They drove the rest of the way in silence; Mulder nodding off occasionally. He woke up with a start when Walter pulled the car off the road and cut the engine.

"Are we there?" he asked.

"Yeah. The place should be just up ahead." Walter strained to see through the darkness. The sky was beginning to lighten in the East and he knew that dawn would soon follow. "We need to go right now, while we still have the cover of darkness."

He pulled the car into the cover of some trees and they got out. They crossed one neighbor's field and they were at the white fence that surrounded the picturesque horse farm. They checked it out for wiring and found none. They crept through the field towards the barn. As they neared it they saw a light on inside. There were two cars parked in front.

Then they heard it; the whistling of a whip through the air and the unmistakable sound of it hitting flesh and the scream. Walter lost it and started to run. Mulder grabbed him and wrestled him into the shadows behind the barn.

"You can't go in there like that!" He held Walter back. The whip cracked again followed by another scream.

"We've got to stop it! NOW!" Walter hissed out through gritted teeth.

"We will. How many men did you say he had with him?"

"Just two. We ought to be able to take them out easy." Walter was itching to burst in.

"We will. Let's get a look first and see where everyone is; see how they are armed."

The whip cracked again and this time there was just a whimper; then voices talking.

"He's out, Boss. You want I should continue?"

"Wait until he wakes up. He won't feel it if he's unconscious now, will he?" The old man lit a new cigarette and inhaled deeply. "Get some water." He ordered one of them.

One man stepped out the back door of the barn carrying a pail and Walter took him out with the butt of his gun to the back of his head. They drug him off a ways and dumped him.

A quick look inside showed just one guy standing there with a whip; and the old man.

Alex was hanging by his wrists from a rope thrown over a rafter in the roof; his feet barely touching the floor; his ankles bound together and his shirt off. His back was laid open with slash marks criss-crossing it; streaks of blood down his back. His head was over to one side, obviously unconscious.

Walter stood for a moment, frozen. He thought he might throw up or pass out himself.

Mulder jostled his arm. "Are you ready? Let's go get him."

They walked through the open door, side by side, guns drawn. The old man looked up expecting the guy with the pail of water. A look of shock crossed his face; then it was serene again. The guy with the whip stared at them, glanced across the room where his weapons were and knew he'd never make it. He took one look at his boss and let the whip fall to the ground and slowly raised his hands.

"Cut him down!" Walter ordered to the guy who obeyed without question. Walter caught him as he fell.

Mulder walked over to the old man. "Krycek is out of it now. You had your pay-back; leave them alone." Then he brought the butt of his gun down over the old man's head, knocking him out cold and went back to Walter who was trying to revive Alex.

"We need to get him out of here, now before they come to. Where did that other one go?"

"I don't know. He took off. I don't care. Let's just get him out of here." Walter picked Alex up and hoisted him over his shoulder.

When they got outside the one guy had the engine started to his car and he was trying to haul his unconscious buddy into the back seat. Mulder walked up to him, put his gun to his head and said, "We're borrowing your car. Any objections?"

"No…no sir. The keys are in it."

"No need to report it stolen. We'll leave it off down the road." They climbed in and Mulder drove them to where they had parked their car. They switched vehicles and took off.

"Do you want to take him to a hospital?" Mulder asked over his shoulder to Walter in the back seat who was trying to make Alex comfortable. His efforts were answered with a moan.

"No. We can't risk it. Do you think Scully would take care of him?"

"Yeah. I'll give her a call." He punched the number into his cell phone as he drove. "Hi, it's me. We need your help." He paused while Scully questioned him about what was happening. "It seems the whole thing was a set up to catch Krycek. The old man had him whipped. We got him back but he looks pretty bad. Taking him to a hospital is not an option. You think you can take care of him for us? We owe him." Another pause then,"Good. Meet us at my place in about an hour and a half."

The time sped by and before they knew it, they were in Alexandria and helping a staggering Alex into the back entrance of the apartment building. The elevator was deserted and shortly they were inside Mulder's apartment. They took Alex into the bedroom and lay him face down the bed. He was drifting in and out of consciousness.

They had just gotten there when Scully arrived.

"Sir? It's good to see you. What have you got to do with all this? I thought you were retired?" She greeted Walter with a chain of questions.

"It's a long story, Dana. He's in here." They took her into the bedroom and she started immediately tending to the wounds.

"He seems to wake up but keeps passing out again." Walter paced anxiously near the bed.

"That's the body's way of protecting itself from feeling the pain that's been inflicted on it. It rouses, feels the pain that it can't handle and checks out again. These injuries are extremely painful but not meant to be fatal. He's going to be in a world of hurt for a while. I brought some pain killers and some antibiotics that he should take for at least ten days." She stood after her work was done.

"He'll be all right. I gave him an injection for the pain. Next time he comes to, he'll probably stay awake. Now would the two of you care to fill me in on what's going on? How did you find Mulder and how did you even know he was missing? And where the hell have you been? We haven't heard a word from you since you left!"

The three of them walked into the living room and sat down. Walter explained everything; how Alex had been monitoring the bureau and how they had found Mulder and how it had all been a trap to draw Alex out of hiding. He was just finishing up with the tale of how they found Alex when he came walking out of the bedroom.

"Anyone seen my shirt?" He asked, a little groggy.

"Hey there," Walter came quickly over to him, "here it is." He held the shirt for him and helped him ease it on over his head then helped him on with his jacket. "You ready to go home or do you still have business here you need to take care of?" He glanced over at Mulder.

Alex's eyes followed Walter's glance and shook his head no. "I just want to go home. Will you take me home?"

"With pleasure." Then to Scully he said, "Any special instructions for his back?"

She got up and started pawing through her bag. "Here's the antibiotics. Krycek, you need to take them all; it's ten day's worth. Here's the pain pills, instructions on the side; one every 12 hours; no alcohol while you're taking them; here's some extra bandages; no showers for at least 24 hours; then you can shower and change the bandages. This is an antiseptic spray you can spray on when it starts itching and it will; this should help with that. I guess that's about all."

"Thank you, Scully," Alex said stuffing the supplies in his jacket pocket. "I appreciate you help; you too, Mulder. I owe you."

"Nah. We're about even, I guess." He said with sad eyes knowing the one person in the world he felt he could open up with was walking out of his life and he'd probably never see him again. He stood with hands shoved into his pockets.

"We owe the both of you and we'll never forget what you did for us. We are grateful beyond words but thank you." Walter hugged them both as they headed out the door.

They drove their rental car back to the air port where they got it and took the shuttle bus over to where their truck was parked. In no time they were on the road, headed home.

"Walter, I'm so sorry I didn't tell you before about Mulder. I'm ashamed to say that it meant nothing to me but apparently it meant something to him. I'm sorry he got hurt, and I'm sorry you did too. I just didn't think about it. These last few months have been like a fairy-tale for me. I tried to forget everything about those years. I wanted to put it all behind me. Are you still mad at me?"

"I'm not mad, Alex. I was shocked and hurt at first. I remember a conversation we had where you tried to tell me about the people you had been with and I told you I didn't care. I didn't then and I don't now. I have you back and that's all I care about. I just want to get us back home where we're safe and comfortable. How's the back doing. If you want to stop and get out and walk around a bit, we can."

"No, I don't want to stop but I would like to hit a drive through. I'm starving and I'll bet you haven't had anything to eat either, have you?"

"I could eat," Walter grinned at him, grateful to be talking about something as mundane as food. "Looks like there's some places up ahead. We'll grab a bite and get on down the road."

"Sounds great!" Alex smiled back at him and relaxed, once again in the company of the only man he had ever trusted in his life.

They got their food and Walter asked, "You want to eat here or on the road?"

"On the road. I want to get home; to OUR home." Alex said.

"Yeah, me too." He pulled back up onto the highway with a roar and headed north.

They ate their sandwiches as they drove, Alex leaning forward now and then to ease the discomfort in his back.

"You sure you're all right?" Walter asked.

"I am now. Now that I know you're not mad at me; and we're heading home. You know, that place never seemed like 'home' before. It was always just a place I bought. But with you there, its home." He smiled his green-eyed smile at Walter.

"That's exactly the way I felt about my condo. It was never 'home'. Just a place I was staying. Our place is 'home'."

"I love you, Walter. Is that OK?"

"Uh huh. I love you too. I think maybe that's what makes it a home for us."

"I think you're right."

They headed on up the road towards their home and the rest of their lives.

THE END


End file.
